Day 12 - Day 21

I'm going to race through those days I've missed posting here with a recap:

Day 12

I had ample opportunity to practice by remembering patience in my reaction to a someone who chafes me at every turn. This remembering I am the problem in my world is tough stuff, in this; If I have to stand for my actions, I have to stand for ALL my actions.

The latter part of my day was a truly wonderful evening with kids I hadn't seen in thirty years. THIRTY. YEARS. Dinner and carousing at our thirtieth class reunion was a much needed balm to frazzled emotions and raw nerves. It was also a test for me. There has been a thorn in my side for thirty years connected to the continued actions of an other...and I shouldn't see it the way I do.

LEARNING CURVE

Day 13

GREAT day. Happiness filled day. Closeness and ribbing and jaunting and merriment. Until, there came the test. (every day? we get tested every day, Lord? i didn't even have to get tested every day in school!) It is in those moments, I am tested - when it's "all good" - and learn how far I have to grow.

Day 14

That was a Monday? Ahhh, yes. I was still able to ride the wave of nostalgia. Good day. The whole day was a good day. As much as I've pointed it out, this being aware of how important this scripture is in my life, how I know it will change my life, I know too; the worst days are the blessed days.

Day 15 - Day 19

A working blur. Evasive customers. Absentee customers. Inept people. Not nice, eh? Also the truth. Outwardly, not a one knew my struggle. I am professional. I am patient. On the outside. YUK. On my inside, I vented and pouted and pointed fingers. In my head, I held conversations with those people-in-test-form who pushed buttons and pulled rugs. That's all gotta go, if I'm to be changed. When I AM changed, it will go.

Day 20

Might as well have been Day 1 all over again. All after thoroughly enjoying my church service, too. Right out the window all THAT went.

Day 21

And, here I am. Which reminds me:

This was one of the hymns in service. I cry every single time. And, here I am again. I am brought back to center. I am happy in my reprimand. I am thankful I mess up. Here I am, Lord. :-)

Day 10

image courtesy thecriticalpath.info    

We wait in lines for these, right ?

image courtesy bellanaija.com

I don't know about you but, I woulda' waited a lllonnng time for this!

image courtesy meethtebeatlesforreal.blogspot.com 

And though, I was far too young to have waited for these, I would have. Just like this.

It hit me: when we are trying to learn through a piece of scripture that hangdogs our every waking moment, we are, in essence, waiting in line (albeit, within) for each part to make sense, that we might always and truly live it. We peruse the Sunday Paper (The Bible), we land on a particular event (a book or chapter), and then we wait in line (the piece of scripture as a whole) until it's our turn to hold that prized ticket (The Understanding). If the event is really, really good (and, come on, they usually are because we chose it), and we pay close attention (introspection, experience, and prayer) and are drawn into the story, we leave the venue and tell the story over, and over, and over.

I for One, am arriving before the birds. How about you?

Day 9

Years ago, during my I'm-going-to-read-every-self-improvement-book-ever phase, I read how much it helps to break a day into segments of manageable time, fifteen minutes, as example. A few days ago, I realized it would help me with this year-long trek, to break 1 Corinthians 13:4-13 into increments of learning. Learning to live the words. I realized too, some may take longer than others; we are, after all, carriers. Of that which we need the most growth in. I'm a pretty patient gal, really. Or so I thought, until I really began to examine why this particular scripture convicts me as much as it has. As it still is. Patience isn't just in hectic moments with over-tired toddlers, with the sluggard behind the DMV counter, or the self-possessed intellect with more stale air than tact; patience is best lived where a person is...I'm still learning. Incrementally.